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I am a lazy slacker

It was almost a year ago that I lost my editorial at this medical compliance publishing company. I have no real job, but I do not miss the place. Lo, it was a business entirely funded by health care providers who have a bit of cash to throw around, but who also obviously don't ask the Little People what they need, since all the materials we produce suck. I had to drive an hour to get there. The authors were unfamiliar with the concept of an article outline, and doubly unaware of the sheer banality of their subject area, as well as the quadrouply unaware of the irony of their overinflated egos. The other young women on my team never invited me to lunch with them, and in fact, often made plans for lunch in front of me. I was criticized on my performance review for appearing "visibly upset" at times when the stress made me cry in some meetings, but I'm sure that this document might have noted my inability to show that I gave a shit if I remained stoic during my very short tenure. Fun stuff.

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A year later, and I don't have a fucking job with benefits. I also can't really find a fucking job. I've applied to Target twice, only to be spurned. I have applied to a shitload of social service jobs that ask for nothing more than a high school diploma and a clean CORI. Hey, I've never This would make me feel like a loser if other really smart people with even better work ethics than me also didn't lack jobs.

But, unlike a year ago, Obama is in office, and Obama believes in hope. I hope that I find my UMass transcript so that I can show I took Intro to Psych in 2004 and enroll in a slightly less remedial Psychology Through the Lifespan course at community college. I can hope that the registrar at community college notes that I took graduate level psychology courses as an undergraduate in 2000 and 2001 and 2002, and clearly thus probably know the material that got covered at enroll. If the whole hope thing doesn't pull through, I'll roll with this Obama theme and believe in the power of change. Maybe Beacon Hill Community College will change its prerequisite requirements in the psychology department, so I can take some fucking prerequisites to get into motherfucking nursing school.

If that change in BHCC registrar protocol doesn't happen, I'll believe in the power of the computer to change into a sentient being. That retroactive FASFA for the 2008 - 2009 school year I need to get reimbursed for some other nursing prerequs isn't going to fill out itself, you know. Not yet, anyway.

I am a lazy motherfucker in other realms as well. For instance, I have pretty much posted interesting (to me, but perhaps the readers have a different opinion) stuff to Facebook rather than on Livejournal. (Sometimes images and prose lack a certain artistic and/or literary jouissance if the author doesn't expound a bit on them. (But, I like to be long winded sometimes, and perhaps this belief is self serving in that it fules the rhetorical inter referential circle jerk of blogging.)) Also, I really need to get to that Renaissance art exhibit at the MFA. Also, need to make an appointment with my uberfancy rheumatologist and dermatologist because my palmoplantar keratoderma* is spreading a teensy bit. Perhaps unrelated, my best friend worries that the form of scleroderma I have that also defies textbook definition or anything my docs have ever seen might be slightly more active. But that's still two counts of medical laziness.

I do not underachieve in the arena of critter appreciation. Also, since I'm going to school full time in two weeks, I think I'm gonna get me some cable tv. It is like a brain vacation in a relaxobox. Till those two weeks come, I might just watch a whole lot of cable tv. Not because I'm a slacker or anything. It would be to fortify my reserves of relaxify before the academic rodeo, replete as it is with psychological whip lash, commences.

*That's fancy medical speak for generic bumps on the hands or feet that could look like anything, and could have any cause. And no, it doesn't look as gross as anything you might see on the internet.

Comments

( 1 comment — Leave a comment )
unlikeme
May. 18th, 2009 04:35 pm (UTC)
once in a performance eval for my last job I got told:
"sometimes your emotions show on your face"
I thought that's what faces are for.

good luck.
( 1 comment — Leave a comment )

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